I hate it absolutely when I have full day classes! When I come home, my mood will be totally grumpy and I will not be in a position to talk with anyone. If you know me personally, then you will know that I am basically a friendly person but on days like this, all of my friendliness will vanish! Especially between the time I come home and the time till I have had enough rest.
Yesterday was one such day when I had full day class. I had lab in the noon & it was 6 pm when I came home. Needless to say, I was very tired. While entering home, I had my cell phone in hand and I was chatting with my friends. The first thing my mom said was "Is it necessary to use your mobile even when you have just arrived home?" But there was some fun discussion going on in our group on whats app; so I refused to keep my cell down. This went on and on. I was chatting while having food and even after that. My mom was trying to talk to me sitting beside me, she was curious about my day but I was only giving vague replies to her queries. She took it as long as she can but there is a limit to every person's patience and in the end, I ended up testing it to the extreme. My mom got angry and started yelling at me. Not thinking why she was angry, I shouted back saying she always just scolds me no matter what, she just needs a topic to scold me!
Having said that, I stormed off from that room and sat in isolation listening to music. And for some reason, tears started rolling down my eyes. Music always has a soothing effect on me and eventually, I calmed down. Once I regained my senses, I started reflecting on my earlier outburst. I tried to view the whole incident from my mother's point of view. This is how it might have looked for her:
I was waiting for my daughter to come back from college. She usually comes by 1 pm but today she is late. She didn't even come home in the noon for lunch! She must be so tired. I have cooked her favourite dish. Ah! Here she comes finally. But she is walking looking at her cell. I wonder what is so important that she always keeps texting. I asked her to stop chatting but she didn't listen. I am curious to know how her day went. Did something good happen to her? Oh I would love to hear it. Did she face any difficulties? Or maybe had a bad day? I hope that wouldn't have happened. I wonder how the food is.. She didn't even notice I have cooked her favourite dish! She is so busy with her cell; she isn't even listening to what I am saying! Wish she could talk with me a little more. I don't think I could get more time like this once she moves out next year for further studies. The thought itself brings tears to my eyes! I ask her again to tell her about her day at college but she just says 'Ummm' and I lost my patience. I spend whole day alone at home and when she comes home, I think I finally can have a break from the monotonous routine I have whole day. But she doesn't even give me enough time. The thoughts bothered me and I ended up shouting at her. She was hurt. She said I would always find a reason to shout at her but only if she knew how much I loved her! She even started crying. I Wish I could have been a little easy on her...
The thoughts made me feel so ashamed of myself! How could I have been so selfish, that I thought only about myself without even realizing that I was hurting my mom through my actions. I immediately went to her and apologized. She was happy to forgive me and overlook my misbehaviour. Later we sat there talking for a long time. I answered everything she wanted to know and yes, this time, without the cell!
I guess we are all so self obsessed that we always think about ourselves! We assume whatever we do is correct most of the times and hate to give in to other! But often, its important to step into other people's shoe and see how it might have felt for them. Then we will get to see a whole new scenario!
This post was for the We post daily prompt. Today we were required to write about the last disagreement we had with a friend or family member, from their perspective.
Until the next post,
Keep smiling :)