Stationery Chats - WOW #13

       The whole town sleeps peacefully under the moon light. The tiredness of the day making them sleep like a log. Some are dreaming and some are snoring, unaware of the outside world. Mean while some where in the corner house of street three, under the dim light of a zero candle bulb, a muffled cry is heard.

       Seeing the new pen cry, all other stationery items get worried and they start enquiring the reason. "She bit me today" said the pen in between uncontrollable sobs. The pencil is empathetic, having gone through the same pain. "I know how you must be feeling. I totally hate her" says the pencil, wincing as it recalls the torment it had been through. "But wasn't she scolded by her mom last week for the same?" asks the pen stand, all worried. "Oh she has been scolded for that a million times but that kid is stubborn. She doesn't listen to anyone. Moreover she says, she gets ideas while biting the pen. What an excuse!" says the stapler, enlightening the new comers about the norms.

       "She is a monster" says the pen, horrified hearing the news! There is a loud cough and every body turns in that direction. "Oh poor sharpner" wails the scale seeing it covered with dust. "Ever since she has bought that new lead pencil, she hardly looks at you" The sharpner smiles faintly. "I wish she would at least keep the desk clean. Look at the amount of dust here! Such a dirty place" says the pen cringing. "Have you seen her brother's desk? There is not even a speck of dust there. Life was so good until she brought me here" sobs the stapler, remembering the good old days.

image source: eisforidiot.wordpress.com

       The pen wriggles trying to breathe. There was no space to even stand freely in the pen stand. It was filled with lots of unused items. Empty pens, old pencils, sketch pens, markers. "She doesn't have the right to treat us this bad. We have to stand up against her! Else she will continue this way forever" says the pen who could no longer contain the frustration. "Look at her sleeping peacefully, leaving us like this! It's time for pay back. Lets attack her" says the pen, the nib shining under the faint light coming from the bulb, as if mirroring its zeal. "How do you plan on doing it?" asks the eraser. "Oh that's easy. The compass can give me a ride. And the scale and erasers can form a see-saw with the help of which we can go there and pierce her. Let her taste pain and she will understand our position" answers the pen with a wicked edge in its voice.

       "Quiet kid" a loud voice says and every one turns towards the source. The diary that lays in the corner which was a silent observer till now speaks. "Just because you had a rough day, doesn't mean you have to get all worked up like this. Poor girl, she is having a hard time with exams nearing and so little time left to read. She even had a fight with her friend today because of which she is upset. You don't have the slightest idea of what she going through. So just keep quiet and learn to endure" it says, a ring of authority evident in its voice. "Yeah. She is not that bad. I am sure life will turn to normal once her exams are over. And you will find out what a coolest person she is" chirps the paint brush remembering the fun it had painting. All the stationery items feel ashamed for having forgot all those happy moments and joining in with the pen in its insane mission. They thank the diary for reminding them the truth. 

       Meanwhile the alarm rings and I wake up. Oh God! What a dream it was! I go to the desk, to pick up my book and find all the items exactly like I had seen them in the dream. Was it really a dream? Gosh!! Do they really hate me? I hug my diary tightly, thanking it for being on my side and make a mental note to clean the desk that evening.

PS: This post is a part of Write Over the Weekend, an initiative for Indian Bloggers by BlogAdda.

Until the next post,

Keep Smiling :)

Love,

Swathi :)

Loneliness!

        I sit on my bed watching photographs of me and Sameer. I had been doing it from the past few days, re-living every moment captured in those pictures once more - a photograph taken in the park where he was swinging me, our birthday parties, a snap from my cousin’s marriage where I was looking somewhere and he was sneaking a peek at me when my friend had clicked the picture, the walk on the beach where he had proposed to me… That brought a fresh wave of tears. I knew without as much as a glance in the mirror that I looked horrible, eyes swollen and kohl stained cheeks from non-stop crying.

       It was 2 am and I longed to drift into sleep’s oblivion where I could escape from all this pain but sleep wasn't an option. It had been days since I last slept peacefully. My days were filled with a constant internal turmoil. I was on the verge of breaking down but I still smiled on the surface, acting like I was fine in front of others; and no one noticed! I wonder if I was that good of an actress or people just didn't give a damn to observe closely and to figure out how lonely I was. I would break down as soon as I reached the familiarity of my room, the pent up emotions flowing out at once, all pretense vanishing in thin air.

       I look at my cell hoping to see messages from Sameer saying he missed me and scolding me for being so irresponsible. I almost smiled imagining how he would scold me if he saw the state I was in. I was sure he would frown more if I laughed when he was scolding. Ah, I was so desperate to hear his voice once. But I knew I couldn’t. I close my eyes wishing to escape from this all but the images from that night started to flash before my eyes.

       Images of him smiling as he said a bye to me as we returned from the beach. I was beaming with happiness after the proposal. I was smiling as I saw Sameer's name flash on my cell. I had received it thinking how it was just minutes before he had left and he already was calling me; only to be greeted with a news that shook the ground beneath my feet. "Madam the person has died due to an accident. The car driver was drunk and it was a hit and run case. We are calling you as your number was last dialled from this cell. Do you know this person?" I hadn't been able to respond to his questions; I was numb from shock! I couldn't believe how the day had turned out. My Sameer had paid an irrevocable price for someone else's fault; and I still was paying for the same! Memories from that fateful night haunted me as loneliness gripped me hard, enveloping me inside the black void. I cried for my loss, for the twisted joke destiny was playing on me. These days Music is my refuge. I can crawl into the space between the notes and curl back to my loneliness. The only escape I have found from this misery. I knew this memory would haunt me for a life time but for now, I tried to find solace in the music for I knew Sameer hated it when I cried.

PS: This story is fiction and is written in response to Write Tribe's Wednesday Prompt 2014 #18.

Until the next post,

Keep Smiling :)

Love,

Swathi :)

The Power of Trying - Bits and Bytes #2

       From childhood till now, I have never took up anything seriously. I pick a hobby randomly and practice it until I either achieve something or till I fail, the latter being the majority! Once I fail, I used to give up completely, never trying to do it again. I never believed in the power of trying. I was reckless and it showed in the work I did. But there was an incident that changed my view.

       I used to go for summer camps every year and once I had been to drawing class, probably in class 5. I thoroughly enjoyed sketching. It came to me naturally and I used to bring home beautiful sketches (well as beautiful as a class 5 student could!) and my mother used to beam with pride. My sir used to praise me and I used to bask in it completely.

       Everything was fine until I was made to hold a brush and try my hand at painting. You would think I aced in it as well but no; I was terrible at it! I used to spoil every sketch as soon as I tried to paint on it. This went on and I was growing frustrated increasingly! One day I was scolded by my sir for not paying attention and that was it. I had stopped going to classes! I know it was very stupid but I hadn't understood it then! At that time, I dropped out of the camp and no matter of convincing could make me go back.

       I had completely given up sketching until class 11 where I had to draw in my Biology record. Interest grew once again and I kept on drawing even in my spare time. I joined for the same drawing class once again and started honing my skills. It felt heavenly, to do something I loved so dearly. "It's time you learn painting. Colors speak so much more than these grey sketches" said my sir. I denied till I could but finally had to give in. It was difficult and as expected, my paintings turned bad. "Try" he used to say every time my face fell.

        There was one painting I loved very much, something I had seen a girl do. I wanted to try it but I knew I couldn't do it. Sir saw the dream in my eyes and he gave me the painting and said "You have 4 days until next class. You can try if you want to. You never know what you can do until you try!" I took it home and I don't know how many papers I tore until I finally managed to do it. Here is how it turned out at last.

       It's pretty good isn't it? No, I am not boasting. You will understand it yourself if you see my first try of the same. Here it is

       That is how I learnt that giving up was easy but it did no good. If I had tried this hard all those years back, I would have probably learnt a lot by now. Well, I guess its better late than never. So next time you encounter a failure, just remember, it indeed is a small step in the way of success and as they say "Keep on trying until you succeed" :)

Until the next post,

Keep Smiling :)

Love,

Swathi :)

Super Heroes and Super Powers - WOW #12

        Everyone dreams of having some super powers. And especially during our childhood, these dreams are firmly rooted in our minds either due to a particular story we heard or due to a fancy movie we saw! They do influence a great part of our imagination. And just like everyone else, I too had few dreams where I wanted to possess super powers; powers that would make me cool!

image source: www.bubblews.com

       It all started with the Potter craze! I was in class two I guess. I loved this game 'Dave' and was addicted to it. But I had to wait till my dad was free so that he could take me to his friend's home where I would play with his son (let me call him M) when they both chatted away happily. That was the first time I saw Harry Potter movie. M was totally crazy about HP and he made me watch the movie with him. That did it. I was glassy eyed all through the movie and signed in for life time potter fan club. We used to play potter games all the time. M set the rule saying he is HP and I can be Hermoine throughout the game, whenever we play it! That was cheating! I wanted to be HP! But he would take none of it! "I am the guy and I get to be HP" he said and that was final!

image source: www.forcesofgeek.com

       So that's how started my first dream of super powers. I wished I had powers like Harry; magical powers. I used to wait for postman hoping I would get acceptance letter from 'Hogwarts' where I could learn magic. I wished I could battle evil just like Harry did and help my friends, earning points for 'Gryffindor' I even had memorized all the spells and cast it on appropriate occasions using my wand (yes, I had prepared one for myself) Of course they never worked! I even wished I could play 'Quidditch' and was caught by M trying to kick the broom off the floor! It was hilarious sight for him and little embarrassing for me every time he talked about it in front of anyone!

       Then there was 'The Winx Club' which I saw on Cartoon Network. The girls looked ordinary and they went to school but it wasn't just a school. It was a school where they taught Magic. They grew wings when they were in trouble and fought with the evil. I wished I was that cool! Then came our very own Indian movie 'Koi Mil Gaya' where the alien granted super powers to Hrithik! How I wished it happened with me! One thing common in all my dreams was 'Magic' and I always wished I had it in me. I wanted to fight the evil and save the world. Of course I believed that 'With great power comes great responsibilities' and I was ready to take it.

       Those were the dreams I had as a kid. But as years passed, my dreams became more self centered. The novels I read influenced my idea of super powers a lot and I had a different perspective. I had read 'The Immortal Series' and I wanted to read minds like the female protagonist. She could memorize the whole book just in one glance! She could even pick thoughts from others' brain! How cool is that! Life would have been so much easier with no need to stress over studying for exams or worrying what the other person is thinking! I would know it all! I so wanted to have that power!

       Likewise the dreams kept changing all the time. Sometimes I wished I could see the future and prevent bad things from happening and some other times I wished I could be invisible according to my wish so that I can sneak on some people. Oh the dreams never ended and I never was able to decide which was that super power I wanted to have.

       Now if I think about it, the answer might probably vary! If some one would really grant me 'one' super power according to my wish, then I want that power to be 'Strength'! Strength to protect the ones I love, strength to persevere even when things get difficult and fulfill my dreams, strength to walk on the right path and strength to make the right decisions. After all, these are the things that really matter; at least for me, they do! So that is the super power I wish to have :)

PS: This post is a part of Write Over the Weekend, an initiative for Indian Bloggers by BlogAdda.

Until the next post,
Keep Smiling :)

Love,
Swathi :)

A Project Demo! - Bits and Bytes #1

       Recently I have been writing so much for prompts that I am writing either fiction stories or poem; free write completely forgotten until yesterday I was writing my dear diary and realized how much I missed it! So here is a new concept 'BITS AND BYTES' that I came up with the help of my dear friend Nibha Gupta, under which there will be a free write every week starting from today.

       It is the exam season and this week I had lab exams. I am so glad that I am done with it! Though it should have been easier than theory, it definitely is not and we despise these a lot! A major credit of this hatred goes to the Viva Voce that will be conducted during these exams. I swear these are the only times when I feel so helpless and oh yes, clueless too! Though this time we didn't have viva, we had an even more challenge! Demo!

        I had finished executing the program and I sit there waiting for my turn to be slaughtered. Finally the external calls me and my project partner and asks us to give a demo of the game we have designed. He sits there staring at the screen, his expression assures the already scared mind of ours that we are in for trouble. So we start with the demo. We aren't even halfway through when he decides to interfere. 

Examiner: "Stop! How does this work?"

I don't know why but during these times, my speaking ability goes weak and my inner voice becomes dominant! 

Inner Voice: You would have learnt it if you had paid attention to what I said till now! 

image source: marthabeck.com

       But of course I don't say it aloud. I explain him the concepts again. Once he nods his head indicating he understood, I resume with further explanations and he doesn't take long to interject! 

Examiner: "Where did you get inspiration to work on this?"

Inner Voice: Inspiration? Please! I was forced to do this. If not for the syllabus, I would never have done this. So the question of inspiration is a moot point! 

Me:"We used to play this game online and when we were presented with an opportunity to design one, we knew it had to be this!"

Examiner: "So how did you like working in OpenGL platform?"

Inner Voice: I definitely would ban it from syllabus if I could! What's the use of struggling with something which isn't of much use for us!

Me:"It was an awesome experience sir! We got to learn so much about graphics and the concept of designing a game"

Inner Voice: aah! How I hated the whole lame process!

Examiner: "So why did you stop? Continue with your explanations"

Inner Voice: I would have finished it by now had you not thought it necessary to interject at every point!

Me: Sorry sir! I will complete it now.

       So I and my partner finished explaining the whole thing and he did look intrigued. He asked us questions about how it worked again and once he got it, he turned scornful!

Examiner: "So what's special about this? I think its pretty simple and I am sure I can finish it for the first time only"

       And he starts playing. And he lost :D Oh how I loved it! 

Examiner: "Well that was because I was a little confused and I didn't know it right. I will do it this time"

Inner Voice: That is what first time is all about! If you are well trained at it, then it wouldn't be called your first time!

       We didn't speak a word and just watched his attempts at figuring out the game, which he did eventually and with a smug expression he continued.

Examiner: "See. It was as simple as that! I don't understand what was so special in that. Tell me why do you think I will accept this?"

       Though he looked intrigued by it few minutes back, now he was calling it simple! And was threatening us about the validity of it! We didn't know what to answer and over time we have learnt that, the more you answer, the more questions follow! So we just kept fidgeting in our seats waiting for the punch line, which soon followed.

Examiner: "I will give you some modifications. If you can incorporate those in your game, I will accept it. What say?"

Inner Voice: Have you left us an option to say no! 

Me: "Definitely Sir. We will do it"

       He was having fun, more than he should! He gave us some changes to do and left to see the demo of another group whom we watched with pity! We could hear the same conversation continuing there. After half an hour of efforts, we finally figured it out. Phew! He came to check it further and his reaction was incredulous!

Examiner: "Hmmm... This is what you did! I see! Oh well that's fine I guess. Okay I will think about your project!"

       He definitely was teasing us now enjoying every bit of it. He didn't talk any further and just said we could leave! We were waiting for it and escaped from there without as much sparing a glance in his direction, for we feared he would start all over again! We heaved a sigh of relief once we were out of lab. That was one such experience.

       Phew! Thank God it ended! At least I can breathe freely for next six months before another such encounter! That was my experience. Did you have any similar experience? Do share them here.

Until the next post,

Keep Smiling :)

Love,

Swathi :)

My Role Model

       I often hear in news about female foeticide and abandoning of the new born baby if it turns out to be a girl! There still are many places in India where this act happens but thankfully I live in a slightly developed town where these things occur less. Even so, I have been told that when I was born, there was certain disappointment among some people; they were expecting a boy, who would take ahead the glory of family to new heights. As if a girl couldn't do it!

      And there even were some people who pitied and blamed my maternal grandfather for his luck! He had 4 daughters and no son and I have heard my mom telling me stories of her childhood; how they were bullied by their cousins and how people would look down on him and pity him. Some even said that he might have committed some sin in his previous birth for which he was being punished now! Nonsense!! But he never paid heed to them; not then and certainly not now! He was happy and indeed counted us as blessings.

       I was his first and only granddaughter, the rest being grandsons; so I obviously was pampered a lot. I remember awaiting summer holidays so that I could visit him. He has inspired me in several ways ever since then. He is a man of divine patience and he believes in finding good in everything and everyone. He had a provision store until few years back and that was pretty famous in the whole town. He is respected by everyone and I feel proud saying I am his granddaughter. From narrating stories to me amidst his busy schedule to teaching me coping up with different situations, he did it all.

       I clearly remember an incident from my childhood. When I had been to Bhadravati (his place), I badly wanted to buy a sweet from the shop in front of our home. But I was sure that would earn me a little lecture about how that shop is not good and how he would get me something good later! No, I didn't want something good but I wanted the same thing I was eyeing, the white sweet which promised delight! So I slowly sneaked into my grandpa’s shop and took a rupee from the cash counter slowly. Right then he turned! I stopped dead in my tracks when I saw his eyes narrowing; there were a lot of people and I was becoming red in face thinking of the scene that would continue. But within a fraction of second, the smile returned and I was let go. I had rejoiced that I was successful in fooling him but I was wrong. Later that night I was chided for stealth. He had seen it but he had let me go for he didn't want to put me to shame in front of everyone.

       That day I had learnt the biggest lesson of my life – "If you are praising someone, then do it in front of everyone and if you have to scold someone, make sure you do it alone!" I have seen so many people shouting at others but my grandpa was a man of patience. And more over, just a disapproving from him look was enough to make you realize your mistake; there was no need for him to raise his voice. Whenever I visited him, I used to sit in his shop all the time, so I got a pretty good chance of knowing him. People used to call him ‘Anna’ (meaning brother) fondly. They loved talking to him and he always used to give chocolates to their kids. Oh they adored him!  I had seen him giving away goods to some people on credits and when I voiced my thoughts about how it’s a bad idea, he had said “Trusting is my choice. Proving me right or wrong is in their hands. Moreover, what goes around comes around. If you were meant to lose something, you will lose it anyhow”

       Now that all his daughters are married, he and my grandmother stay by themselves. I often see my mom worrying about it and I am worried too but he just brushes off any pleas of coming down to stay with us saying it isn't a big deal! Even at the age of 75, he gets up early at 4, does yoga, walks for 6 kms, completes daily chores at home and then runs his shop! Yes, he runs a steel shop on his own. He never sits idle; he says sitting idle is the only thing he hates! We even at this young age complain about work load being too much or days going bad but seeing him, I feel inspired. He always is enthusiastic when it comes to learning new things and never thinks twice before helping some one in need. 

       He was there for me all along; right from my first cycle to my first mobile, he was the one bought them for me and the one who shared my joys. Some people give you free advice for every problem of yours without even knowing half of the things but he is a man of knowledge and he practices what he preaches. Whenever I used to complain about the unfairness of life when something bad happened, he used to assure me everything had a purpose and good and bad are indeed two faces of a coin! So many of my life’s lessons I have learnt from him and I still continue to look up to him whenever I need guidance. He truly is a role model for me. His patience, his ease with which he handles things and the kindness are something which I wish I can learn.

       I so wanted to take a selfie for this activity but couldn't as we live in different places! Still I didn't want to miss adding his photo here.

My lovely grandfather - Sheshgiri Bhat

PS: I am writing about #MyRoleModel as a part of the activity by Gillette India in association with BlogAdda.com.

Until the next post,

Keep Smiling :)

Love,

Swathi :)

Rains!

The heat of the summer,

Becoming unbearable everyday!

All the fun and laughter,

Seems to have evaporated as well!

The joy of watching the rain,

Sitting curled up near the window.

Or maybe going out for once

And enjoying the dance in the rain.

That lovely smell of mud,

And the hot cup of coffee.

The relief as the heat fades away,

Putting an end to our torment!

The beauty of mother earth

As she blossoms with joy!

It definitely is a sight to see,

Oh how I miss them all!

I look up at the sky longingly,

And wish it would rain soon.

Washing away the unbearable heat

And bringing smiles again.

image source: eofdreams.com

PS: Linking this poem to the Poetry Jam prompt and the word for this week is 'Rain'

Until the next post,

Keep Smiling :)

Love,

Swathi :)